Sometimes when I can’t make a decision about something, I play this little game I like to call “the penny game”. I take my change jar, dump out all the pennies, and start putting them into piles – one pile for each option or choice. Those options only get a penny for positive things/attributes. Sometimes one attribute might be really important, and I’ll award that option more than one penny.
For example: Strawberry ice cream versus cookie dough ice cream. Strawberry gets a penny for real fruit in it, but I really like cookie dough, so cookie dough gets two pennies for having chunks of it mixed in. Is this starting to make sense? The choice with the most pennies at the end is the winner and usually this material example of weighing choices helps me see clearly what the proper selection is.
Well, amidst all this confusion in my life about what I really want, I had to stop and think about what my choices really were. And, play the penny game once again. So, I decided to do a top ten list in lieu of pennies this time, and see if the rest of the world might agree with my reasons why being single gets so many pennies in its pile. And, I can thank Russell for inspiring the idea of warping the penny game into a top ten list. Check out his blog, it’s a bag full of fun!
The top 10 reasons being single is better than being in a relationship:
1. FREEDOM. Yes, sweet freedom. Men and women have fought and died for it, and it’s probably my favorite part of being single. As a single female, I don’t have to check in with anyone ever to make sure plans mesh, or if it’s ok to do this or that. I can do whatever the hell I please, whenever the hell I please. Or, anyone I please. Which brings me to
2. SEXUAL CHOICE. I can f*ck whoever I choose. Oh, there is a hot guy eyeing me from across the room? Hell yes I can go flirt with him! And I have no reason to feel guilty for it. I can even take him home if I want to, and there is no one to judge me for it. There is a lot of fun to be had and variety to taste out there. Sure, I’ll probably get tired of it and want to settle down at some point….but for now, carpe diem!
3. MONEY. I sure save a hell of a lot of it being single. Even though I’m the girl in the relationship and society dictates that men typically pay for things, I always end up spending more money than I would if it were just me. I spend more money putting gas in the tank, food in my house, and doing things with guys. And, I’m not a heartless gold digger…I do eventually end up paying for some things. Or, in the case of The Ex, I paid for most things. -_-
4. MORE ME TIME. This has got to be one of my favorites, too. Sure, it’s nice to have someone to go out with, but that is what friends are for, too! I get more friend time being single, too! This one is a two-part perk! But, I’ve learned in life to be perfectly happy doing things and going places on my own. I don’t have to skip going to the gym because we have plans or you want to see me. I can sit in bed and write my blog about you without having to wait until I have a few hours without you around. I can hang around, legs unshaven, hair messy, with my cat sleeping on my tits and not give a shit about anything but the movie I’m watching. That is relaxing for me.
5. NO ARGUMENTS. Shit, that one is self explanatory.
6. MORE ATTENTION. I can take the blinders off as a single girl and notice the other men checking me out. This may be more of a personal perk, because I tend to naturally put those blinders on when I’m in a relationship. The minute I’m single, I notice the world around me a lot more. And the ego boosts that go with it.
7. TRAVEL BENEFITS. Now, I love to travel. I don’t, however, like to travel with many other people. You have to compromise on things and meet their special needs, and possibly give up on things that you really want to do. Also, some people are lousy travelers! They get sick, or travel too heavy or too light, get cranky, or just can’t relax. Also, the trip costs half as much if you’re only buying one airfare! Ok, sure, sometimes you can split a hotel or something, but, the way I travel, I like doing what I want to do, whether I’m doing it alone or not.
8. SELF-IMPROVEMENT. I have more time to work on me when I have more “me” time. I go to the gym. I go to church. I spend time thinking about who I want to be and achieving my goals when my mental and physical resources aren’t being used up on someone else. I can get through my day without daydreaming about a guy, or being angry about something he did. I can devote my mind to my career, my goals, and pondering about my life instead of just running through it. I can “stop and smell the roses” if I want to. Sometimes relationships make us complacent: “Hell, they love me for the way that I am, so why should I change anything?” Ask any person that put on weight after getting attached.
9. MORE SPACE. This is both personal and physical. First of all, you’re not all up in my grill 24 hours a day, breathing my air and stuff. Ok, sometimes I want guys in my grill, but other times it’s overbearing. Secondly, I can make my house as pretty as I want, and no one is here to complain about it. No one is leaving empty toilet paper rolls in the bathroom, I’m not picking someone else’s laundry up off the floor or doing their dishes, and none of my drawers are tied up with someone else’s stuff. And, I can sprawl all over the bed if I want to at night.
10. NO COMPLAINTS. Oh, you didn’t like the way I cooked your steak? Did I kick you in my sleep last night? Are you tired of listening to this radio station? NO. BECAUSE YOU’RE NOT HERE TO COMPLAIN ABOUT IT.
One of these days I might make a top ten for the other side of the argument. Maybe.